Crises often emerge naturally during transitional phases of life, when we shift from one stage to another. The exact timing of these phases can vary greatly from person to person. For example, the concept of middle age today can span a wide age range—from 30 to 50—depending on when someone completed their education, became independent, started a family, and so on.
There are also theories suggesting that life unfolds in 7-year cycles, where each cycle, though not necessarily turbulent, brings its own challenges and the need to adapt to new realities and personal demands. Some examples include the transition from early childhood to school at age 7, the entry into adolescence around age 14, the phase of choosing a profession and gaining independence, and later, forming a family. Family life itself follows predictable developmental stages and crises, which couples either navigate successfully—or not.
The midlife crisis is a period when a person begins to question the quality of their life, their goals, and accomplishments. This stage may bring feelings of disappointment or uncertainty about the future, as one becomes aware that they may have already passed the halfway mark in life and starts wondering:
Have I fulfilled my dreams? Have I missed something important?
This crisis can manifest in different ways, including:
- Reevaluating achievements: A person may begin to doubt their past accomplishments and reflect on their life’s trajectory.
- Seeking new experiences and goals: There may be a strong desire for change—new adventures, career shifts, changes in relationships, or even physical transformation.
- Grieving the loss of youth or trying to recapture it: Some try to reclaim youth through buying expensive items, starting new hobbies or romantic relationships, or undergoing cosmetic procedures.
- Relationship issues: Conflicts may arise in personal life or partnerships, as people begin to question whether their current relationship or family life brings true satisfaction.
An existential crisis can be triggered by major life events such as the loss of a loved one, divorce, personal failure, or trauma, as well as deeper philosophical or spiritual questions about existence, death, and life’s meaning. This state may bring about feelings of emptiness, despair, confusion, or a lack of identity or purpose, and often leads to questioning one’s goals, values, roles, and sense of belonging.
In these types of crises, psychotherapy can be especially helpful in preventing impulsive or risky decisions, or a radical shift in life’s direction that may ultimately prove destructive. During a midlife crisis, people may behave like adolescents again—making rash moves in an attempt to recover lost time or correct past mistakes. But this urgency can often lead to new mistakes, even more harmful, leaving a bitter aftertaste in the second half of life.
The farewell to youth is a kind of grief that everyone experiences in their own way, but the stages of grief are universal—and the first stage is denial. We've all seen people around us who completely reject the idea of aging and claim that “age is just a number.”
Yes, how we feel and look at a certain age is deeply personal and varies, but the truth remains: aging is inevitable and irreversible, no matter how fiercely we resist it. Modern industries—cosmetic and surgical—offer physical transformation to help us “fight” aging. But psychotherapy offers something far more valuable: psychological transformation that allows us to accept our age without drama or suffering—perhaps even with gratitude.
Reaching an older age is a privilege—one not granted to everyone. Maturity and aging offer advantages that youth simply cannot. And to truly like ourselves in old age, it helps to look back and see a life well lived. That’s why it’s so important to live consciously and address our inner conflicts early on—before middle age arrives unannounced and unprepared.
We often say that life is short. But in truth, life isn't short—youth is. And on top of that, youth creates the illusion that it will last forever.
Until one day… we wake up at 40.
Sure, we can insist that life after 40 is a “second youth,” but let’s be honest—it’s definitely not the first.
In fact, true youth only makes up about one-third of our life—sometimes even less.
So it’s best to live it fully and wisely, not to reach our forties only to realize it’s already slipped away. And if we can only feel whole or fulfilled during youth, then perhaps we've missed the chance to build a deeper, more enduring meaning for our existence.
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